Lillian: A True Story of Multiple Personality Disorder

For most of us, the varied parts of our personalities are woven together and unified by our memories. But what happens when we have no memories? What happens when the components of memory (facts, feelings, and body states) are split apart and no longer relate to each other?

When this story began more than 40 years ago, doctors and psychiatrists were mystified by patients with more than one personality. The diagnosis at the time was Multiple Personality Disorder. Lillian was afflicted with this condition owing to severe abuse during her childhood. Her mind held each trauma separately. Each personality took over her body, developing a life and personality of its own.

Lillian’s aunt, Jean, became friends with 22 personalities. She played hide and seek with four-year-old Mary, taught five-year-old Amy to write, shopped for undergarments with Robin Jean, and communicated endlessly with each of the others. In the process, each personality revealed its beginnings. Over time, each personality revealed its own memories of their trauma and eventually became integrated.

This is an exquisite and beautifully written story of poverty, transgenerational abuse, mental illness, and the healing power of love, science, and spirituality.

As one reader puts it: “You will laugh, cry, turn away and come back again to its compelling truth.”

I Only Remember Grievances And Desserts

“Revenge is a dish best served cold” – Khan Noonien Singh

My more than 20 years of professional experience in the male-dominated career of emergency management has not exactly been a walk in the park. As less worn as the “path less traveled” may be, it is neither laced with ease nor filled with treasure. I have found it to be paved with judgment and spite. This was my experience as a pregnant teenager who insisted she would not be defined by the state of her body but forge ahead in life anyway. Although this was perhaps the lowest point of my life, I was able to find solace in cooking (particularly baking) and still decided to continue the path. And today, I can say that has made all the difference—which is the name of the chocolate truffles recipe I open with, along with the genesis of my difference-making choices.

On my career journey, I have encountered all dimensions of characters—the Cretin, the Quintessential Douche Bag, and the “Special Place in Hell” Vipers (made up of the Queen Bee and the BFF)—who have all attempted to rock the boat of my career advancement with their various strategies.

However, I have also encountered mentors who not only let me know I am not alone and provided astounding support but also stood by me and for me before others in the face of adversity. A combination of all these factors and the decisions I make along the way (some good, others, admittedly hasty and improperly reasoned) have culminated in the person I have become, both personally and professionally, and of course, a lot of recipes specially tailored to the various seasons I have had to go through.

I Have a Beautiful Brain, Compared to the Brains of Alcoholics and Drug Addicts

In this insightful and deeply personal exploration, Stewart Odendhal DVM PhD offers a unique perspective on the devastating effects of alcohol and drug addiction. Drawing from his professional background and personal encounters with addiction, Odendhal embarks on a mission to educate and deter young individuals from the lures of alcohol. This book is not only a narrative but a crusade against the widespread ignorance about the debilitating effects of alcohol on the brain.

Beginning with a startling revelation from a CT scan, Odendhal’s curiosity is piqued by the physical differences in the brains of alcoholics and drug addicts compared to those who abstain. This discovery propels him into an exhaustive research journey, delving into the science behind addiction, the societal implications, and personal anecdotes that paint a vivid picture of the struggles with alcoholism.

With chapters detailing his own experiences with alcoholic family members, the scientific intricacies of alcohol’s impact on the brain, and a poignant account of his battle with smoking addiction, Odendhal’s narrative is both educational and deeply human. He reflects on his interactions with Alcoholics Anonymous members, exploring the gap between scientific knowledge and the personal experiences of those battling addiction.

I Have a Beautiful Brain, Compared to the Brains of Alcoholics and Drug Addicts is a clarion call for a more informed approach to alcohol education, emphasizing the need for early intervention and awareness. Odendhal’s dedication to this cause shines through each page, making this book an essential read for anyone touched by the effects of alcoholism or seeking to understand the complex interplay between addiction and the human brain.

How to Eat an Elephant

The how-to guide for overcoming obstacles, the daily mantra, the wild adventure, the quarter-life crisis, and the self-help book of the century - all wrapped into one crazy story about the life of a "kinda Amish" girl. It's messy, honest, real, and inspiring. A young woman's fearless journey into the unknown after having an epiphany about the true meaning of life. The beautifully woven masterpiece looks at the life of a small-town girl who, at the age of seven, predicted that she would one day write a book. Despite being shunned by her family, she decided to take a leap of faith and left home at the age of nineteen with $500 to her name and a one-way ticket to Honolulu, Hawaii. How to Eat an Elephant is an eloquent reflection of the life of a first-generation college graduate. The nuanced writing style brings new life to the mundane artifacts of everyday life.

Hollow Bone Recovery

Alcoholism is an insidious thief. It has robbed millions of their life, freedom, health, love, and sanity. For many years, doctors and psychiatrists, who had spent countless hours trying to help these unfortunate people, considered chronic alcoholism a hopeless condition. Even today, alcoholics are often shunned by society and considered weak and morally defective.  In the 1930s, two such outcasts, a stock speculator and a proctologist, discovered a formula that kept them sober when all other efforts had failed. It certainly wasn’t an overnight success and even today it’s not exactly popular, though it has gained worldwide respect, saved countless lives, healed relationships, and turned derelicts into responsible, stable citizens. The idea of living a happy and useful life, free from the compulsion to drink, is beyond the imagination for anyone suffering with this terrible disease, but those of us who have adopted this plan of living by 12 spiritual principles have experienced this exact miracle. The only pre-requisites are desperation, an open mind, and willingness. This journal charts the author’s progress toward physical, mental, emotional sobriety and peace with God and fellow human beings. By sharing her experiences, the author hopes to encourage others to join her in trudging this road of hope and freedom.

Healthier Living

Healthier Living illuminates the path to wellness through wisdom, underscoring the Biblical adage that wisdom surpasses all earthly desires. This book emphasizes that wisdom, defined as the knowledge of what actions to take or avoid in various situations, is crucial for maintaining health and well-being. It blends practical advice with a personalized approach to health, highlighting the importance of understanding what actions to take in specific health scenarios, even when common sense might suggest otherwise. This insightful guide encourages readers to adopt a wise approach to their overall health and wellness journey.

Go Beyond Resilience

In addition to sharing some of her personal and professional life experiences, failures, and successes, Coach K takes us on a journey to question how we make decisions and how we ‘play it safe,’ in order to keep others around us happy. Her professional training as a coach and down-to-earth writing style brings forward powerful inquiries and opens up a plethora of new perspectives and self-care tips. A passionate advocate for being true to oneself and keeping our values close, Coach K speaks of how we reflect on our lives and play our own movies in our heads to feel whether we are doing what we set out to achieve in the first place. Her commitment to being brave and making those unpopular decisions is timely – when our worlds seem to collide in the most unexpected ways throughout relationships, careers, and a significant hunger for personal growth.

Four Seasons of Your Life

Four Seasons of Your Life is a spiritual self-help book that guides readers on a journey of self-discovery and understanding. Through life’s experiences and the changes we go through, we can learn to navigate our emotions and reach different levels of maturity. By understanding our past and present selves, we can make better decisions and choose the right path to achieve our goals and desires. This book helps readers rediscover their true selves and find their unique path to happiness. With a focus on the idea that we are all angels experiencing human experiences, Four Seasons of Your Life encourages readers to reach their full potential and live a fulfilling life.

Forever True Love

In our modern, fast-paced world, we often find ourselves juggling work, family, and personal commitments. Amidst this whirlwind, it’s easy to lose sight of ourselves and our deepest desires, especially the yearning for a soulmate. To discover true happiness and love, it’s essential to shift our priorities and perspectives. Slowing down, being present, and cherishing the little moments can illuminate the path to profound connections. Just as a garden blooms with a variety of flowers, showcasing nature’s harmonious dance of life and love, our lives too can flourish. Embrace your journey, let love lead the way, and step forward without fear of the unknown.

F**K Fear

F**K Fear is a self-help book that gives readers simplistic and straightforward information on how to use the power within themselves to accomplish a peaceful and successful life. F**K Fear includes information on physical, mental, financial, and emotional well-being in relation to the mind. The life-changing information provokes thoughtfulness and mindfulness. After each section, there are questions that help the reader pause and reflect. Additionally, meditations are included to help reprogram people’s minds for greatness. The title may be a bit vulgar, but it is not half as vulgar as living a depressing, unloving, anxious, broke, bitter life caused by fear. Get past the title and get into the book because this book helps readers achieve their goals using the power of their minds!

Emotional Freedom with No Fear, No Anger, and No Insecurity

There is an ancient belief that he who rules the self is greater than he who has captured a city. To rule the self, you have to have no fear, no anger, and no insecurities. In Emotional Freedom with No Fear, No Anger, and No Insecurity, over three dozen behaviors, tools, and skills are provided to help you achieve command of the self. You are not an emotionally free person until you have raised your level of consciousness to the extent that it allows you to control the thoughts that come into your mind. We may be advanced technologically, educationally, and intellectually, but we languish at a low, dysfunctional level of social development. The lack of acceptance we find in our social culture has impaired or damaged our self-worth. The opinions that we have of ourselves can have more of an impact on our lives emotionally, physically, mentally, and psychologically than anything else.A lack of understanding of our self has kept us in the dark about our real self. Gaining knowledge and discovering how we function in our relationship with our self and with others will open up a whole new realm and reveal a wealth of information.This enlightenment will allow you to take many different avenues and paths most suitable to you, and reveal answers and solutions about how you should live your life so that you can be the leader of the self who is in charge of the self.

Connections

I am a practicing psychotherapist with over fifty years of experience, still actively seeing patients in the San Diego area. I currently specialize in those needing treatment for long-term care, chronic conditions, and PTSD.

I returned to my roots in writing Connections. I expanded upon the developmental frameworks I taught in my UCSD courses; my students encouraged me to adapt these core psychological constructs into a matrix encompassing my other passions, like physics and spirituality. I believe we need an ongoing inner Renaissance if we hope to spark one in the wider world.